Now that I'm the boss, there's nobody to yell at me for smelling like a bar in the morning.
i can't believe you bought a jetta. you know that's a girl car, right? if i hadn't had sex with you, i'd have no other proof you're straight.
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
I am in macy's and just straight up heard an old lady taking a crap in her depends.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
You're just horny.
Yea, and? I appreciate you as a person too if that helps.
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
multitasking: i'm now sitting up and smoking my joint.
I mean, the night I fell out of that bus I made you pour vodka onto my wound to clean it, then duct taped a paper towel to my hand and kept drinking.
I'm just trying to win a butt plug dude
He doesn't have much of a personality but he makes up for it with his sexual prowess
keeper.
On a scale from 1 to 10 how gross is it to get a chili dog from a vending machine?
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
Positive reviews on angieslist?
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