I have a client coming in and there's a note that says she wants her hair to like Elisabeth Hasselback's from the view
that's Oklahoma for you
we made out on top of his cat.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
STOP fucking him and come play in the snow with us!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I can't believe you're trying to guilt me into a blow j because a tornado made you homeless.
Is it working?
It was a legit night tell he threw a snowball in the bar, thats when I knew it was time to go to the next bar.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what compelled you to fill her bra with pudding and freeze it in the first place?
i might remember if i didn't get knocked out with it later that day.
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
I got home at 1 am on a weeknight with lube in my hair. I'd say it was a successful first date.
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
Looks like the opera singer hook up is paying off. Ran into the MILF from 407 and she said “your lady friend sounded like a very lucky girl.”
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