just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
remember when jerking off was fun and not a neccesity
She said her first boyfreind was so small she is still technically a virgin.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
Reading my bank statement stoned makes me feel like an adult.
So I found where you barfed in my house. Just wanted to let you know that my cat barfed on the kitchen floor in a show of solidarity
I can't stop drooling did you spike my drink?
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
Should I put the money for my dealer in a Christmas card? You know, make it more frstive?
A boy in some branch of the military kissed me I think I'm going through an American sniper phase
I think I almost ran over some kid I went to high school with. Guilt factor: moderate to low.
I'm covered in bite marks and have a cracked rib - was a good weekend
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Having to do the walk of shame on crutches was defiently a first for me. cheers to the governor, klove
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
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