I want to walk on stilts...naked
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
I miss the days when all my weekends consisted of were 69 and crunchwraps
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
there's cocaine on the ipad again........... was your sister here last night?
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I used my dress as a plate for pizza rolls last night
MILK DIDN'T HELP. IT'S NOT HELPING
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Lmao. K I'll be 100% honest. I was over at your place like 12 hours ago with your roommate. If I hadn't of been there then I'd take you up on your booty call offer. So. If you're not creeped out another time please?
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
