i can't wait to go to hell
yeah...all of my friends will be there for sure
Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
I'm crying, drinking alone and applying for jobs tonight. I figure the alcohol will lower my job standards.
High school girls are buying me shots. This will not end well.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Do not, I repeat, DO NOT uncuff him no matter how much he begs. He knows what he did.
DUDE!!!!! THERE IS A MIDGET HANDING OUT RICE KRISPIE TREATS!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU WHEN THE COOL SHIT GOES DOWN???????
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
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