I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow those two combined like captain planet and shit went haywire
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
I told her we had to stay at the bar until at least midnight because that's when my direct deposit hit, don't tell me i'm not responsible
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
All time low: no dry towels so I'm using the sex towel to dry off
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