The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
you started crying because you didn't get to wear your rainboots this week so i turned on the shower and let you jump around in it
youre the best friend ever
I'm like 99% sure I made out with Kevin Spacey last night. Not good.
Was just told that I was slipped 2 hits of acid in my in flight drink before takeoff. 8 hours to Germany wish me luck
alright. I just need to set some ground rules, no lighting me on fire, and no broken bones. fair?
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
Everywhere I look there's another kitten this is so ideal
Can I live on acid? Kittens man. Kittens.
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
We'll never be able to grow apart now. You can't look at a stranger & say "Yea I ate goldfish crackers off his dick." & just be casual about that.
She broke up with me after I spent the whole day speaking in nothing but Marshawn Lynch quotes.
I enjoy the company of your penis
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Look, I know why you're asking me, but just because I'm gay does not make me a wiki on butt sex. Ask a doctor or you know, the internet like everyone else.
Randomize
