you kept screaming that dicks were growing out of your back and then you started crying cause they were so far from your vag
could you get any more awkward?
Shut up. It sucks being the ugly friend, I would know, but someones gotta play the role
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Even jesus won't love me after tonight. I'm going hard.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
walk of shame this morning involved walking through the in-home daycare that she runs while it was full of kids. judgemental little shits. on a plus, got a juice box and a graham cracker for the walk home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what I'm hearing? Blah, blah, blah, I have pneumonia, blah, blah, blah, I'm a quitter. COME OVER AND PUT YOUR PENIS INSIDE ME.
If eating a cheesesteak naked doesn't make me feel better, then I don't know what will.
Seriously-without actually meaning the statement for it's words- that made me want to put a baby in you.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
If I'm going to keep blacking out this much I need to start taking more pictures.
He just texted me asking for his shirt back and I said I didn't have it and then I ran into him 5 minutes later while wearing the said shirt
Randomize