she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
just found the deal breaker
hairy back?
he can't live within 1000 ft of a school
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
Reading old FB posts. Why did I ever stop drinking?
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
When you leave ur sleepover boy on ur front porch waiting for a cab bc work
I screenshoted his dick pic the other day because it literally looked like a brontosaurus. Like that really tall dinosaur that eats grass. Like I wanna draw a face on it.
Fucker was flying a Bruins flag. He can pick up the dog's poop himself.
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