I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Small penises have feelings too.
Have you ever noticed every guy named Shaant has scene hair and date girls with racoons stripes in theirs
His name should be shouldn't
i love that we sang a whole new world together while you carried me through campus
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're upstairs smoking....the password is pineapple
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
The number of times I've puked in the Walgreens bathroom is becoming way too many for my pride.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Swear to god our friendship has its limits. Stop peeing on the fucking refrigerator.
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
Well as if this year didn't suck enough already, I can now count 2015 as the year I got chlamydia
Now I have to go back and sober fuck him. For science.
I accidentally sent my mom a nude picture of my ass... she replied with how did you get that angle ?
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