nut hugger
I hate seeing commercials about babies when i'm high
Yeah, I don't like babies at all
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
I can't find the keys to get out of my front door, there are random socks in my bicycle basket and I can see a plastic handle of cheap vodka sitting on my porch. oh, and my head just broke u with me.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
I hurt so much. Not in the emotional way, but in the I went to dive bars sorta way.
Making drunken Mac n cheese at 3 am I understand why witches constantly stir their cauldrons. Much more homogenized temperature and slim chance of boiling over. Good job witches.
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
You whispered 'For Frodo', handed me your shirt, and charged campus security.
Im so sorry for peeing on your chest.
Randomize
