At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
At a bar where three women in denim shorts are debating techniques and skillsets for wrangling goats. You stay classy Delaware.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
Sooo Zach and Judd are on my porch drunk eating leaves and flowers...
So, the officer that worked my wreck, I'm rockin his world tonight. He saw me high on morphine in the ER. So he knows my level of crazy. Think he'll agree to wear his gun?
So many things can go wrong tonight.
So what exactly does one do when my driver gets a DUI and is now arrested and I'm still hiding in the trunk?
I FOUND THE LEGS
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
I'd have to have a ring. Like I don't want to be called "the ex girlfriend that shit on me"
Randomize
