Holy shit I just stopped short on route 18 because I thought my gps was saying I had to turn right in 11 feet. After almost hitting the guardrail I realized I had to turn in 11 miles.
Fuck I'm high.
Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
yeah after seeing those pics of her puking into my underwear drawer i remembered again why i didn't want to invite her.
you didn't check your sock drawer yet did you
I just don't have the heart to tell my mom you peed in our washer machine last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the homeless guy was waiting for me this morning. this is the closest to a boyfriend ive had in years.
It's all good. The CSI guy came and I played the theme song while he in was in our place. The cops even laughed.
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
Hey in a lighter note I also nutted in that cheerleader too if she got prego there would have been a team reunion on Maury
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How I know we're old. Don knows the owner. The owner said 'How about some shots?' We said no thanks. He looked puzzled and came back later and said 'You know it's on the house?' We said 'Yeah, no thanks.'
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I'm just going to take a nap and hope I wake up more attractive.
Yea I went out in footie pajamas and still got laid. Good night for u?
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize