So remember when i bet you that girl uses dick to validate her existence?
...yea
She's valid.
my phone is just a graveyard for last nights mistakes. at least it's giving me hints as to where i was though, i'm like carmen sandiego
My landlord doesn't knock anymore when he shows the apt... So i just had sex in front of a family.
didn't stop?
naw, they were rude, not me.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please get rnbert tn get chebk h'm in i'm no dead when he getr gome
On a scale of one to america, how free are you this weekend?
I was trying to be an adult about it and simply deal with the situation, but a bowl seemed much more comforting.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FUCK... Pulled a chick from the bar went to her house passed out on the shitter. She lives in a house full of girls. They were making poop jokes as i left
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
Randomize