Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
i woke up with someone drivers licenses in my wallet this am...he said i don't have a business card so just take my drivers license
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
I feel like just to watch it, I need to be high. To understand it, I'd need enough drugs to kill an elephant.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I will give you the couch, a small portion of the fridge, and plenty of beer.
Got my future figured out. I'm oddly comforted. Thanks, bro.
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
This week I fucked a police officer and called both the Senators from the state I'm in and the one I'm moving to. What have you done since the election?
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize