I dont need to watch it. And stop comparing your life to Entourage.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Apparently i just threw up in the bathroom, i told them i just blew my nose. i don't think they believe me...
He called the drink "The Annexation of Puerto Rico". He wouldn't tell us whats in it but said that we should all fear for our lives. Let's do this.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
It involved anal and pop rocks. Tell me how that could have ended well.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
Someone puked in my crockpot. Your friends can’t come over any more.
Our livers are going to hate us.
It's okay, they're regenerative. God wanted this.
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