She went from zero to smokin in five shots
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
sometime during the course of last night, i decided to get donuts for this morning. i'm a fucking genius when i smoke.
no, i swear. she uses a huge jagermeister flag as a sheet on her bed.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
You are going to be so proud of me, I'm wearing underwear AND tights. That's two layers more than usual between my vagina and the world.
Having a vagina does not stop me from believeing my balls are bigger than yours.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
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