Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.
30 People Reveal The Moment They Realized: ‘Oh Sh*t, I’m An A**hole’
So I did end up texting him last night... I asked him how he felt about haircuts... not sure where I was going with that one?
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Just switched my underwear without taking my pants off don't ever be ashamed to be related to me
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
30 Tiny Celebrity Tattoos You’ll Want To Run Out And Copy ASAP
We had a One Night Stand 6 months ago but he just Facebook invited me to his wedding. Who the fuck does that.
Like Is it appropriate to tell your boss you banged a guy in the back of a truck at a wedding? Probably not.
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow