literally had 100 drinks last night.
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
So apparently I shook her hand very polite, said weiner and walked away
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
not to be a dick but do you remember the names of all your friends i made out with after we broke up?
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
he yelled at me like a drill sergeant while I quickly tried to take off my pants
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
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