I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
Drinking with birthday clown in the backyard shed at a 5 year olds birthday party at 12 in the afternoon. My life doesn't need any adjustments
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
There's a little game I've come up with since the mess of a party I had; it's called "tinsel or condom wrapper? (or: what's that on the floor?)"
so i went over to her house and we played crash bandicoot, ate calzones, and had sex all day. im in love.
Randomize
