I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
i just fingered the ice cream at home instead of getting a spoon
been there done that
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up tied to the door handle with reindeer patterned socks. You can tell it's Christmas.
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
I'm still not walking right. We need some boundaries for "drink-or-dare"...
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
Jordan and I are drunk and barred out at the liquor store sitting in the awesome $70 Corona bench bargaining with the owner for a lower price, all while passing the Belvedere bottle between the two of us. Real life. College has down this.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I will never in my life forget you letting the cat lick your tongue
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
you know what? fuck you, fuck your nana, and ESPECIALLY FUCK THE BLACKHAWKS.
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