A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
it was like one of those moments where the couple runs together and kisses and everyone in the airport claps. but instead of clapping an indian guy walked by and said 'ahhhright! get some!'
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what happen last night but the fact that it's 9 am and I need to put my dick in something means it didn't go as planned.
3 months til "no sober october" start prepping now. i cant have you bitch out on me halfway through like last year.
The problem with never associating with your roommate is that you never know if they're dead in their room with the door closed or just gone for the weekend...I sprayed some febreeze just in case.
He came in 20 minutes late for his final wearing plastic bags on his feet, and a tablecloth cape. Explain.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dont know what we smoked last night but I woke up and found out I started writing a book called White Trash Princess. Its the best thing Ive ever read
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
We fucked to Bonnie Tyler in my car. He's the one.
my grocery cart consisted of hershey bars, sour patch kids, starbursts, mayo, 4 frozen pizzas, 4 lunchables, and chips. clearly, i can't do this on my own.
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