Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
You act like I'm friends with her or something. I only screw her boyfriend!
Oh yeah.
He had a huge mole on his dick. Genetics has cockblocked him for life.
i cant belive i got a ticket! i know what his dick tastes like!
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
I sewed up my pants, stole his girlfriends white shirt, and went to work hungover like a responsible adult.
I just got the two most enjoyable things in life in one... Weed delivered in bubble wrap.
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Why put me through the conflicting battle of being happy for your vagina but sad for my vagina for no reason ahole
My mother is currently smoking weed with a dying bee so his last moments aren't miserable. And she wonders why I rescued a grasshopper missing a leg.
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
