How long do you think herpes can live on chapstick?
I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
she was trying to give me a handjob in biology class while we were learning about the penis.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It took 6 cruisers to bust the party last night. Cop asked if the theme was a beach party. I said I would fucking hope so with 8 tons of sand in the garage
I just remembered that we had an in-depth conversation about how it was too stressful to wear pants.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
we just drove past a kid stuck in a tree what a wonderful time to be alive
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Randomize
