Katie is reenacting me jizzing in her eye via emoticons...
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
How did you steal an entire pie?
I don't know. It's in my purse.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she's using the space heater to try to heat up a pop-tart...
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
I have a video (on my shattered iphone) of a random DJ at some bar giving me a birthday shoutout and texts from random numbers talking about birthday sex. My birthday is in April... Happy birthday to me?
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I faked an orgasm during phone sex last night. This relationship is starting to become real.
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
The profile of her ass is just unreal. Weird way to use profile I know, but never more accurate
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
Just escaped from the ER. Meet me at the bar in 20 minutes.
hey, so i dont know your name. but im guessing we had sex last night. seeing that you're in my phone as "had sex time thursty thursday guy"
Randomize