I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I only broke up with her because the ex sex is amazing. She will do ANYTHING if i even hint at getting back together
I tried doing a handstand in the middle of the bar and I ended up kicking this old guy in the face and broke his glasses. Thats how I got kicked out
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Turned on my GPS and all that it said in the search bar was "beer,"
My Yoga instructor is playing the music from 'Requiem for a Dream' it makes me very reluctant to put my ass in the air
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
