Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
For future reference, never invite the people you met at Dunkin Donuts at 2am to your house to watch Dogma
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We would be rich. And the whole world would be stoned.
If you can find a Canadian Lesbian to have pity sex with me, let me know.
You're putting the star player on the bench. You dont put Michael Jordan on the bench.
Are you referring to my vagina as Michael Jordan?
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He facetimed with his son when he was still inside of me. If that's not a dedicated dad I don't know what is
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
Btw, how did you break into my room, and why did you decide that covering the mushrooms with a blanket was more secure than a lock on my door?
Randomize