Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
It's a sign that no dudes december is about to start: I have a yeast infection.
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Dude you chased a girl around the yard and then fell over the curb. Face first. You got up on your own tho so you reached champion status
I think I'm crying more because after all these years he never learned to spell you or use a comma properly from me
Have you considered sword swallowing? Something about that bj tells me you could make a it a career.
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
The Adderall says yes, but my body says no.
Randomize