yea, the bartender wouldn't serve you because you kept asking for "a slice of beer"
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Even though he was watching you pee on his bedroom floor, you kept denying it and saying he was dreaming
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
We invented this drinking game where you pick and random video and drink for every misspelled word in the youtube comments. It did not end well.
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Hahaha she was way into you and you kept arguing about burritos. It was amazing.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
And you said I'm not athletic, I rubbed one out with my sports band on, it's the same as walking 1/4 mile.
Randomize
