This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
She's in the bathroom crying cuz she can't get the condom out of her giner. Do you have tongs?
Just did a line with a monopoly bill. Tell me I'm not fancy.
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
Do you know many girls there are in gay bars waiting for me to do coke off their tits? A lot.
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
Guess who just made out with Sloth from The Goonies!
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
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