I just farted so loud that my cat got so scared he fell off the couch.
Myspace is for pedophiles and tweakers in the 818 trying to hook up. I always forget theres music there too
Why am I getting the stink eye from these people? They're acting like BYOB isn't kosher in a laundromat.
Apparently i was peeing on things and marking my territory. I broke their light socket too. Needless to say im banned from their apartment.
yeah he couldn't walk in a straight line and started throwing up and told the cop he just has an astigmatism
I'm not sure how appropriate a drug deal is while at a wake.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Thats not real though. Slash there are other extenuating circumstances to lead me to believe dick is wanted
HOLY FUCK I SPELLED EXTENUATING RIGHT ON THE FIRST TRY. IM THE BEST DRUNK NA
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Randomize
