Who goes to Church hungover
Those who weren't lucky enough to go still drunk
I think my fart just growled at me.
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I ate 12 cupcakes in less than 24 hours, so no judgement here.
Her virginity is one of the last things that remains of our childhood.
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well he can play the xylophone with his erect cock... So he's got that going for him
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Then we woke up and they shouted "Emergency Vodka!!" and that's how we got redrunk.
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
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