Well i just wrestled a cop... p.s. i won
Let's just say he looked at my vagina like it was a rubics cube.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
He sent me a pic stitch collage of all the tit pics I had sexted him this month. It was so sweet!
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll like his pictures on Instagram every once and a while so that when he sees my name he is reminded of the best blow job he's ever gotten.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My uncle showed up to pick us up at the bar just as I bought a drink so I put it in my pocket #drunksmart
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
If I get really high and watch Beauty and The Beast on our Netflx account, will you judge me?
Only if you start before I get home!
We'll handle his penis the same way we handle day drinking; together.
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