the more pounds shes got the more points. bonus points awarded for specialty moves used. aka broken cowboy, tobogan, dutch oven, or brazilian fake out.
if i remember New Year's Eve then there is something seriously wrong.
You know... If I put the same amount of effort into school as I put into giving women orgasms I would be a Rhodes scholar
I do not want to touch your penis after this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I think it's safe to say me, swords and vodka can never be aloud in the same room again.
Idgaf if he's a manwhore, he's like the mt. everest of penises. howcan I NOT try to put that inside me?
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Pretty sure I just pissed straight whiskey...
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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