All drunkenness aside, confirm u are alive
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
Drinking wine. Reading twilight. On a Friday night. Biggest loser contest. First Place.
I brought red and green boonsfarm to the white elephant party. classy and festive. I think this is what people are referring to when they talk about killing two birds with one stone.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
When I was with my girlfriend I was averaging 1 random hookup a week. In the 2 months I've been single I haven't got any. I think I need her back.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
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New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
When he gets asked "is it in?" more than his name you arent missing out on much more than a petite tampon.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
he brings me coffee and gets a blow job. not sure if I trained him or he trained me or it's simply mutually beneficial beautiful.
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night