we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
All I can tell you is you will need a rain slicker for tonight's festivities. Any clothes underneath would be highly frowned upon as well.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
I stole another quarter from the bathroom. I'm slowly getting rich drinking here.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
She has also never texted me first which I think might be a tell-tale sign she wants me to die alone.
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
I love you but this is the first Saturday I have ever spent at the police station. And where are my boxers?
It's a novelty for anyone to see a girl like me in a skirt like this milking a cow
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