i feel like my life has become an afroman song and idk whether i should be sad about that or not
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
I need to hang out with girls who make more mistakes
we've started having sober sex
you really do like him
People Are Arguing Over This Guy’s Petty Reaction To Splitting Lunch With His Co-Worker
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
Please tell me I was just dreaming when I asked if I could borrow your jesus dildo
I am at a point in my life where I don't want to brush my teeth for my tinder date because toothpaste and martinis don't mix.
Girl Logs Into Twitter Only To Find Out Her Dad Is Trending For The Most Outrageous Reason
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Was it your intent last night to burn the house down? With a waffle..
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.