I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
were you wearing a green and blue thong last night?
yes! wait why?
because i found it in my pocket this morning...
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
I have been drinking at the bar so long today that I literally just found a spiderweb from my leg to the bar.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just got tipped $5 to put a barbie in a waffle cone and drip caramel sauce on it while a group of dudes cheered and one took pics. 90% sure they were sober
Should we start at nine like normal people or now like alcoholics?
sex in a tree stand. check.
you lucky bastard
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
You don't care if I shave my legs, but you insist I be conscious for sex. Whatever. I really think your priorities are out of whack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
If I ever go to Canada, I'm fucking the maple syrup out of his Canadian ass.
I just finished a four mile round trip walk to CVS to buy shaving cream and lube. You're welcome.
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
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