Upon hearing of his newfound access to every orifice... even ones he just made up... the Grinch's penis grew three sizes that day.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I'll start choreographing the sperm rain dance now
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
The woman that sang I Touch Myself died today. There's only one appropriate way to honor her memory.
I'm on the job.
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
I wonder how many people saw me whip my junk out and bang it on the light post in front of holabird bar and liquors last night. I'm about tired of having to do that.
Nobody saw you except the people in the bar, because you weren't outside. You were inside, and you were smacking it on the mens bathroom door handle
I really hate whoever invented fireball.
How drunk is too drunk to be on an airplane?
ABOUT TO MAKE THE BIGGEST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE, SEND HELP
Have fun and good luck.
I haven't answered because I haven't figured out a polite way of saying fuck no
Randomize
