And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i will never coherently bang her
I can only be a whore so many days outta the week.
Samesies
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Randomize
