you thought you were invisible so you started narrating your actions.
i want to find a way to basically assault his face with my vagina.
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
He said I could pay him back in blow jobs. What's the going rate for those these days?
Chipotle just hit me... I want to go sit in the corner of the shower and cry until morning.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I asked you for a cigarette and you handed me your phone and told me to search for one
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
She thinks I cheated on her 10 years ago in a past life lmao
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Now all my porn is stored in my parents’ basement. It’s like a part of my soul is boxed up
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