Obv we're gonna bbm each other in bed
Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
my resolution for 2011 is to fuck him whenever he wants it. this year I'm going above and beyond the call of booty.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
ever had the feeling "I've been drunk in this bathroom before?" Like De ja drunk?
I didn't have cash to pay cover at the bar, so I traded the bouncer a Krispy Kreme doughnut i had in my purse
Bro.. I am absolutely going to have sex with our old middle school health teacher
Randomize
