Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Im partying with a unicorn. You don't even know.
youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
there was a party in your bed and you weren't invited... change your sheets
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
You ended at least 6 stories with "and that's why I don't snort coke anymore"
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
Remember when you tried to talk but you could only count by 2s?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
Randomize
