She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I've been reduced to Capt. Morgan and Golden Girls reruns. Ugh.
dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Yeah I fingered her in the crowd and the dj saw it and gave me props over the speakers. I got so many high fives.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
Well, I turned down sex again. This is guy #5 in the past 2 weeks. My vagina is going to seek emancipation.
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