We got bored. So we went to planned parenthood to stare at everyone who made worse decisions than us last night.
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
tried to order jimmy johns from the ER last night, the nurses did nottt approve
I searched the house and found a small bottle of sherry which is probably as old as I am, has prob gone off and tastes like shit. I don't care any more. It has come to this.
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
My eyes feel like they're throwing up and I am the only human on campus
She actually was beyond drunk but she for some reason kept calling herself a demigod and made me drive her to a bookstore
I think if wine wasn't a thing I'd give up on life.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
You're swimming in an imaginary pool of pudding. What do you think?
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