Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
whoa...plan B gets you drunker quicker.
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
My favorite part of our friendship is your tits.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
i just got drunk dialed and its 10am. clearly finals are over.
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I chugged a beer while I was riding him and he told me it was the sexiest thing he has ever seen. this guy knows class when he sees it.
nope. It turned out i wasnt the drunkest person asleep in tacobell parking lot.
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
i shit you not. the flight is delayed because they have to change fucking light bulb. all the airport bars are closed and my shit is in checked luggage.
Randomize