After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
This could help me cancel out guys. First 4 that text me get to stay in the loop. And the last one gets the boot. We'll do this til there's only one man standing
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Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
The stripper just invited me to take shots with him out at his car after he gets off stage.. I mean why not? I've already seen everything he's got and it'll be easy to get him naked.
I need like a hormone stopper. Or a chastity belt. Or like a lady business alarm that goes off when I'm being too drunk.
I had such a pleasant walk of shame. The sun was shining, I smiled at all the high school suckers who judged me on their way to school, and I made friends with an old guy and his dog.
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Someone want to explain the bottle of ranch I found in my pants
That guy has been pretty randomly in and out of my vagina for 4 years...I don't think I'm required to tell him when I'm dating.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
It would be awesome if I knew whose teeth these were in my pocket
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.