Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
She punched me in the face after i pulled it out and grabbed my cell phone. Ill be the one hiding in the bushes with one shoe.
Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
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you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
just remembered that i started a tab for just myself at 50 cent beer night last night... i dont understand my life
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
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Someone just asked me if ur the girl that fell through the floor. I HAD to say yes.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
Does having a sippy cup full of wine, at an outlet mall, qualify you as 'having a problem'?
future-me showed up mid trip and gave us a thumbs up.
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I just blocked a guy on grindr for having a little dick. See? I do have standards.
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