Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
And then I chipped his tooth because I got too into it. Helloo, single life.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
after he gave me a diploma for giving him amazing head, getting a regular diploma isnt all that cool.
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Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
Woke up fully clothed in bed sleeping on my purse.....we're back!!!
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
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I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I need to calm my uterus...
I just found out my younger brother has me saved in his contacts as "Womb Primer" and I don't know what to do with this information
He spent ten minutes post bj, limp cock still out, in shock repeating 'best blow job ever'. So yes, yelling I am the penis queen out the car window was justified.
She flirted with a pilot and a frat boy at the airport in Vegas and told our bartender his mask matched her panties so yeah I’d say she’s rebounding from the divorce
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