spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
dont worry about it. i always have emergency bong water with me
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
My roommate just got home. Made an entire package of bacon. Ate it. And then went to bed.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Its like every time I go out with you, it always involves Serbian chicks and taco bell and you always manage to get both all over my bed.
Got so drunk in South Padre some guy put me on a suitcase trolly and pushed me to my room. I flashed my boobs as a tip.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
somehow attending a funeral viewing turned into me snorting cocaine in the bathroom and drawing ninja turtles for children
it's not that I hate people, I just want to rip most of their faces off.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
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